A Grin of Unholy Amusement

I will never go home, don’t think I’ll have to see your face again every second of everyday, all I do is think about you, and all i want to hear is your voice

Fulfill my dreams with your scent, sail my imagination with the melodic sound of a scream

I yelled out to god

No answer

I yelled for a wish
Now I comprehend I really deserve it, anyway I think It’s so far away when I touch you, mermaid of my loathing sea in my useless feelings, remember every second I’m falling for you, because it’s harder to cover the pain with love, a rose, a lily to the thousands of million souls crying black blood from the wax of the knowledge candles that silence cover with the veil of the divine lady.

Now it’s time for me to tell you that I didn’t felt this way before, importance makes me ill; your memory makes me puke on my own pedestal of pride:

I. Pride m. f. The concept of being better than anyone in this soiled position.

The hatred feeding my veins is just a blow in the autumns wind:

II. Anger for the thoughts of me stabbing my chest with the sharpest knife in the world.

I keep on dying and trying to make you feel the same, it’s hard but as the darkness of the night penetrates the little girl’s room to watch over her, protecting the jewel of my heart.
My conscience it’s now repeating empty echoes over the edge of my madness,
I love you…..


I want to keep you in my dark chest forever, and lock you away form the world, so in time crows come to take out my eyes, I would have been prepared to fight them with Uriel’s sword of eternal fire and teal velvet cloak

III. Greed for the wise, greed for the innocent, greed for the ambition of living each day having you by my side, keeping that dirty perfume of yours near my disgusting figure.

The rats have now shared the feeding frenzy with the vultures of my mind, ripping away every part of my decadent flesh prison; the time goes by, goodnight, space of dancing stars to reunite the illusion of art and subconscious in the dreams of a thousand razorblades falling in the rainy day where the rainbow shows its face in the coquelicot field.

IV. Sloth as the cause of feeling numb when I see your eyes, melting second after second my hands, you falling as the snow , blood stains in the ground are fun when I think about it, so scattered and sucked dry by the ground. Perhaps stillness had become the weapon against your influence of dreadful staring, as Perseus’s mirror shield, my static actions will resolve in the emptiness of feelings or the wish for redemption I ought to taste.

V. Envy slowly becomes the fuel that poison my veins, I wanted to see you falling from the great pedestal of Joy and sweet death, may I have the pleasure to resume my conviction and watch the fall as I grow, your broken wings are destroyed by the midnight sun just desperation and wax are left in your innocent stupid sense of being, silly little whore! Your collapse is my ecstasy, for I am the vindicated user of scarlet sand. Now you comprehend how irrational you were, left in the space and the hollow heart you had, no one else would fill it back.

VI. Lust is the ultimate evidence of my human condition, trying to seal up the animal behind my senses, through hate and reason, the extinction of desire has progressed, but the situation overwhelms my mind and result in chaos for my deep extension manners.

I felt repugnance of my creature remains, resulting in this dreadful nausea that develops into my conscience perfection, improving my sense of hatred and misanthropist behavior. Impelled by abhorrence I’ve become my own worst enemy and my finest companion.
Yet dreamed about the act of depression, pretending you’re just a memory for me.

VII. Gluttony feeding my sweeping pores with noxious coil, all that remains is the hunger for your absence, and the appetite for your company, ambiguous feelings entwined in my head although experience of remembrance, brings out your different flavors, and exhales the unique perfume that encircles and imprison my abandoned fragile heart. Forgive me myself for I had now become an unconscious creature filled with love and sorrow.


Forgive these thoughts and forgive my form, but especially, forgive my irresistible emotion.